


Can you hear me?

by Yumislover99



Category: No Fandom
Genre: Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-27
Updated: 2015-01-27
Packaged: 2018-03-09 09:12:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3244202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yumislover99/pseuds/Yumislover99
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kaiden was a police officer who was struck in the back of the skull with a heavy object while out on a call. He was forced into a coma for about two years, and just when his mother was deciding to pull the plug, he started to show signs of waking up. <br/>Stephan and Kaiden were engaged before the accident. When Kaiden woke up, he didn't remember anything aside from who he and Stephan were in their sophomore year in high school. Stephan had been the gay pretty boy that no one had paid attention to, and Kaiden had been the popular big shot track star that everyone loved and adored. He just wasn't as straight as he thought he was, in the end. <br/>However, when he woke up, he didn't remember. He had first fell in love with Stephan's voice, and after an event that left him without vocal cords, he could no longer speak in the way that Kaiden could. <br/>Upon waking up from his coma, Kaiden didn't remember that. He thought Stephan was some sort of freak; that's where the accusations come in.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Can you hear me?

**Author's Note:**

> This is just meant to be a dump for my OC's. If you want to read it, feel free, but please do not take any ideas or characters from this. I would appreciate it if you didn't. This is mostly just for my friends that know my OC's to read, but if you have any questions or are curious to know more, please do comment. I like questions :) 
> 
> The lyrics are from the Matchbox 20 song, Rest Stop.   
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mGSuhydDChw  
> If you're going to read this, please give this a listen if you don't know the song already. The lyrics have been altered with [] so they fit the context.

**I brought you here.**

**I nurtured you after the accident, just like you did for me when I lost my voice. I brought you back to our apartment, and even made up a room for you because I knew that you wouldn’t feel comfortable sharing a bed with someone you didn’t know. I kept the fact that we were engaged to myself because I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable…I just wanted to be close to you again.**

**I loved being able to see you walk again, and I loved hearing you laugh because of me. I loved to hear my name on your lips again. I thought that we were fine. I really thought we were.**

**Things were clicking back into place, and I thought that I was doing everything right.**

**Sure, you got frustrated sometimes because you couldn’t understand me, but I simply brushed it off as “he doesn’t remember”, and that was perfectly okay, because I managed to get my point across somehow, every time.**

_Just three miles from the rest stop_

_And [he] slams on the brakes_

_[He] said I tried to be but I'm not_

_And could you please collect your things_

_I don't wanna be **cold**_

_I don't wanna be **cruel**_

_But I gotta find more_

_Than what's happening with you_

_If you'd - open up the door_

 

**Ah, but then you brought them home…the people who violated me. The ones you protected me from. Because you didn’t remember. And that was okay, but then you laughed with them. You laughed and played along while they belittled me, and Yumi had to be the one to step up and protect me this time. He had to be the one to make all of you leave, even you.**

**I tried speaking, but you didn’t listen. In fact, you spat about how sickening it was to hear me even attempt to speak to you with broken whispers from someone who took care you in front of people who abandoned you years ago.**

**But Kaiden, that was the only way for me to try and get to you because you didn’t remember sign language. You didn’t even attempt to learn it after you woke up. But that was okay, because you didn’t understand.**

**However, things were not okay when you accused me of trying to turn you gay.**

**Things were not okay when you accused me of slipping things into your food to get you to stay with me.**

**Those were only some of the things you accused me of. I don’t care to remember the others.**

**You could have left of your own free will.**

**You didn’t have to stick around.**

**I don’t know why you felt that way, because I know for sure that I couldn’t speak up to force you to do anything. I couldn’t even hit you, but you raised a hand to me, and that’s when I decided that enough was enough.**

 

_[He] said - while you were sleeping_

_I was listening to the radio_

_And wondering what you're dreaming when_

**_It came to mind that I didn't care_ **

_So I thought - hell if it's over_

_I had better end it quick_

_Or I could lose my nerve_

_Are you listening - can you hear me_

**_Have you forgotten_ **

 

**I found that I no longer cared about what you were thinking, when before, it was all I could think about. A few months ago, I would have killed to know what was going on in your head while you were lying in that hospital bed. I waited, I prayed, I begged to have some proof that you could feel me there. I slept there in bed with you, I cried onto your shoulder.**

**But by the way you’re acting now, I know that you didn’t hear it.**

**You didn’t feel me there.**

 

_Just three miles from the rest stop_

_And my mouth's too dry to rage_

_The light was shining from the radio_

_I could barely see [his] face_

**_But [he] knew all the words that I never had said_ **

**_[He] knew the crumpled-up promise of this_ **

**_Broken down man - and as I opened up the door_ **

 

**When you woke up, you didn’t recognize me.**

**That hurt, but I took it with grace because I knew that it wasn’t your fault. I was okay with it. I was okay with bringing you home to our apartment, because at least you would still be there. Beside me, with me, in the same space.**

**Even when I cried myself to sleep every night, craving your touch, I was okay with it because _you were there_. You were in my vicinity, breathing, walking, _speaking_. I waited for so long to hear your voice again, even if the tone wasn’t the same. **

**Even if you weren’t the same.**

 

_[He] said - while you were sleeping_

_I was listening to the radio_

_And wondering what you're dreaming when_

**_It came to mind that I didn't care_ **

_So I thought - hell if it's over_

_I had better end it quick_

_Or I could lose my nerve_

_Are you listening - can you hear me_

_Have you forgotten_

 

**The music swelled in my mind and I screamed; I screamed so loud, but no sound came. I just gasped and cried, pathetic in every sense of the word. I stretched my hand out, but I brushed nothing but air. Empty, cold, still air.**

**I want your life, I want you, but you don’t want me anymore because you don’t remember me. You don’t remember me, and it hurts; it hurts so much. I can’t do anything but try and give you words on a piece of paper that you shredded right in front of me. The only words I had.**

**That was the moment where I knew that I had to let you go.**

 

_[He] said - while you were sleeping_

_I was listening to the radio_

_And wondering what you're dreaming when_

_It came to mind that I didn't care_

_So I thought - hell if it's over_

_I had better end it quick_

_Or I could lose my nerve_

**_Are you listening - can you hear me_ **

 

**There are many things I could have done differently.**

**I could have let you go back to your mom’s.**

**I could have moved back into my own mother’s, or I could have kept the apartment to myself, even though the cold and the loneliness would have gotten to me after a while.**

**But, truthfully, I think being alone in this apartment would be better than having you here now.**

 

_While you were sleeping_

_I was listening to the radio_

_And wondering what you're dreaming when_

_It came to mind that I didn't care_

_So I thought - hell if it's over_

**_I had better end it quick_ **

**_Or I could lose all my nerve_ **

_Are you listening - can you hear me_

 

**I’m so sorry baby, but I can’t do this anymore.**

**I love you.**

**I love you so much.**

**Because I can’t talk, I feel like my words have no meaning to you. They’re just vacant echoes of promises I couldn’t keep and what used to be.**

**You don’t remember me. You don’t remember what we had. You don’t remember how I used to be able to mouth words to you, and you used to just _understand_. You don’t know how to do that anymore. **

**I love you so much.**

**But I can’t do this anymore, Kaiden.**

**I can’t.**

**I just can’t.**

**I can’t cry myself to sleep anymore.**

**I can’t curl up in our…my empty bed, sobbing for some sort of release from this hell that you’ve unknowingly created for me.**

**You don’t know because you don’t remember.**

**I don’t hate you for that.**

**I could never hate you, but I have to let you go because I can’t keep doing this to myself.**

**I can’t keep doing this to you.**

**I can’t keep doing this to myself.**

**I can’t.**

**I just can’t.**

**You can’t hear me anymore.**


End file.
